Portal:Inventions

From Imaginopedia

The Spemmins-Marcuso Aerial Honey Retrieval System allows the operator to access hard-to-reach hives located in tall trees. Some practice may be required before any actual honey is retrieved. Prior experience with calculus is recommended.

Sample preflight calculation for retrieval of a hive weighing n kg located y meters high on a windy day, where r is the the operator's level of self-confidence, measured in absolute reagans (r):

pitch = r * arc(n) / abs(r) + n * E.002

[edit] Farm Ship

Two miles south of Under Stood, lived the child wonder Speckish Equal. Speckish was an inventor of things; a groomer of possibilities, a wisher, a dreamer, a hobnobber with hope, a fiery canon of impracticalities, and a precocious ten hundred year old.

Speckish and her sidekick, Micklebot Shaney, were inseparable and inexhaustible, for they imagined and dreamed all day. Since childhood ®, both of them had been friends, always gallivanting about and asking each other questions about this, questions about that. Nothing was above or below a question, an exploration, a consideration, a conflagration . . . especially (drum roll, please) anything from the stories big and small that they had heard or been told. They were serial experimenters.

One day, Speckish and Micklebot set about to redesign Noah's Ark. The Ark year's had been on The List for ages, but so many things were on The List that it had taken some time to get to the Ark in the first place. But finally, the day had come.

The gals looked at each other with excitement because this project would be much harder than the last one, making a sweater for a Luna Moth. With no further ado, the girls went over to the Well of All Things Wiggly and peered inside to get inspiration. This was a time honored practice that the girls engaged in before they embarked on any major project. The Well was just under the old idlewild tree and was partially covered with branches that had fallen from the tree.